Ever feel so tired that you can’t sleep? \u00a0That seems to be happening to me more and more lately. \u00a0As I sit here, awaiting sleep, I am left with a few random thoughts. \u00a0Lucky you:<\/p>\n
1. Seriously I don’t even eat hot dogs anymore, but the lack of consistency between hot dog packages and hot dog bun packages really annoys the living shit out of me. \u00a0They don’t even try to “trick us” into thinking this was some cosmic accident. \u00a0It’s basically a big ‘ole “Screw You” from corporate america. \u00a0Yeah, I’m on to you, which leads me to:<\/p>\n
2. Wtf is up with me always losing socks in the dryer? \u00a0Yes, I’m sure it’s simply me misplacing things. \u00a0Nope, as I’ve said before (I \u00a0think), it’s a conspiracy by evil Corporate America. \u00a0Where do you think all of that lint comes from huh? It’s not random fibers, it’s the\u00a0desiccated\u00a0remains of your socks people! They are being\u00a0sacrificed\u00a0to some really lame demon that demands sock tribute! \u00a0Joss Whedon, \u00a0there is an idea for a show. \u00a0It’s all yours, just get me a date with Felicia Day, or someone equally awesome. \u00a0You’re welcome.<\/p>\n
3. Why is Chick-Fil-A so yummy, but full of such hate? \u00a0Do they lace it with some kind of psychotropic mushrooms? \u00a0Why do I constantly break my oath to boycott the fuckers? \u00a0Can we put those mushrooms on something healthy for me. \u00a0I’d kill to be this obsessed over a salad. \u00a0(kidding I’m a pacifist. \u00a0No really.)<\/p>\n
Yup, still awake.<\/p>\n
I need to buy a 5 ft metal chicken to annoy my new neighbors with…<\/p>\n
I love the bloggess. \u00a0I want to sit in her living room and collate paper all day.<\/p>\n
I hate JJ Abrahms for what he’s done to Star Trek. \u00a0Really, what’s the point of rebooting if you are going to make a half-assed copy of the Wrath of Khan. \u00a0Asshat… give it to Seth MacFarlane!<\/p>\n
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Ever feel so tired that you can’t sleep? \u00a0That seems to be happening to me more and more lately. \u00a0As I sit here, awaiting sleep, I am left with a few random thoughts. \u00a0Lucky you: 1. Seriously I don’t even eat hot dogs anymore, but the lack of consistency between hot dog packages and hot […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-400","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-random"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/s25aXt-blerg","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/theplatypuses.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/400","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/theplatypuses.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/theplatypuses.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theplatypuses.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theplatypuses.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=400"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/theplatypuses.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/400\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":401,"href":"https:\/\/theplatypuses.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/400\/revisions\/401"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/theplatypuses.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=400"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theplatypuses.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=400"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theplatypuses.com\/wordpress\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=400"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}